The Hangover

Going out for the cowsers pre-Christmas piss-up
One cold Friday night
Yours truly went out and got totally tight.

I surfaced next morning feeling more than half dead
Like someone discharged a fully charged phaser
Straight at my head.
Making me feel like one of the walking dead.

My head felt like made of eggshell
My guts felt like hell.
Plainly yours truly was not her usual sel'
Dragged masel' through the kitchen 
And intae the fridge looking for
Something the hangover tae shift.

Then spotting a can of the orange and the blue,
Oh joy, an ice cold can of iron bru.
Supping it down, I then staggered back to bed
Carefully stepping around my wee doggie's head.

Then feeling not a bit of guilt I shot
Back under my Enterprise quilt
A half an hour later I was able to rise
My head felt nearly normal much to my surprise.

So if you have a hangover here's what to do.
Get yersel an ice cold can of the good ol' iron bru.

Grace Baird Halbert.